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two under two

8 Feb

Yesterday was a mom first for me. I knew this day would come I just didn’t think it would come so soon. My husband had a business trip and I was left to manage my 18 month old and 5 week old all by myself. Both are very demanding and neither one seems to notice the other when it comes to my hands being full. You can’t blame the 5 week old and I most certainly don’t blame the 18 month old either, especially since I can kinda reason with him.

It was wake up time that I was dreading. The morning routine is a cluster-*bleep already but take out a parent and you got a real situation on your hands. Did I mention the dog would need to be walked….Did I mention it is winter and snow and slippery ice are everywhere?

Step one 1.

The baby and I get our act together first. I get him changed and fed, burped and teeth brush (that one for me) in 30 minutes.

Step two 2.

Prep the older one’s gourmet breakfast of microwave pancakes and hashbrown before I go up and get him.

Step three 3.

Listen for the signal…a whiney come get me kinda cry from the older ones room. CHECK

Step four 4.

Secure baby in a good spot away from animals and incoming big brother. CHECK

Step 5.

Quick change the older one, put him in high chair turn on Nick Jr. (Yo Gabba Gabba – Damn it! How parents don’t think this is a kiddie Clockwork Orange is beyond me) ….I didn’t want to resort to TV first thing in the morning but lets face it I am out numbered and it is going to be a long day or survival.

>> fast forward to late afternoon a bowl of popcorn and 2 pixar movies later and Dad is on his way home from the airport. Every toy possible is out and dumped on the floor. The baby went through a total of 6 outfits. To this day I still can’t figure out how he pees all over himself when I change his diaper without me seeing it. Everyone single one of us spells like pee…this I have learned it just part of living with little boys…the smell of pee is constant. My hair if kinda this deformed frizz ball, I still have my PJ’s on and I think I forgot to eat but I really can’t be sure.

I made it. I am officially a mom of two under two!


Modern Swear Jar

3 Feb

A little something I am working on…

Now, I realize that swearing is such a crappy habit for a million reasons but for me the biggest one is that is just sound so harsh…like a record scratch in the conversation. I think it is fair to say I can get pretty frustrated and I am a little loose with the swear words at times. Never with my kids…they seem to give me more of a nervous twitch when all hell is breaking loose. But I do not want them to pick up swearing fr
om me.

So how can I put this horrible habit in its place and do something for the greater  good? I came up with the idea of dusting off the old swear jar but with a modern  twist. There are ton of websites that let individuals fund raise for their favorite  cause or organization. Here is what I am going to do. I live in a tight-knit  community with 300 active moms. They are always out fixing the park making sure  there are holiday events for the kids yatta, yatta. I am willing to bet that a good  portion of them have dirty mouths just like me so…..

I am working on setting up a community swear jar. First I will market it to the  moms and then I will branch out to the rest of the community. I can see the T-shirts  now: I swear by my community or I F@#King love NL…you get the picture. The  moms will basically use this as a kitty fund for the different things we want to do for  the community. There are even times when a family is in trouble so it would be  great to have a small reserve to help them out.

I am going to be pitching this to the “head moms” soon and I hope that it goes well. You know when you are new in the community you have to make sure the existing mommy feathers do not get ruffled my the new young, creative, attractive mom with two gorgeous boys.





the captain